|
 |
RSS Feed  |
a playground of art, photos, videos, writing, music, life |
|
|
You are here
|
Creativity!
|
Get it!
|
I like it!
|
Fun stuff!
|
About me...
|
| |
|
|
|
|
Random Quote
The faster I write the better my output. If I'm going slow I'm in trouble. It means I'm pushing the words instead of being pulled by them.
-- Raymond Chandler
|
|
|
|
|
|
Page Through Blog: << More Recent Posts | Home Page | Earlier Posts >>
Blog Archive by Month | Blog Archive by Story or Tag | Search Blog and Comments
I'm almost done with this, and as much as I would love to finish, I can't - I'm too tired.  After I finish this one, I hope to get started on another and be done with it by the end of the weekend. That would make six cards. |
|
|
|
|
Every time I start a painting, there's a part of me that laughs and points and suggests that I'm a fool. Which I might be, but I don't care. I'm going to do this thing anyway. And so I do, and gradually I shake all of my assumptions and I stop seeing "curtains" or a "woman" or whatever, and it's just colors. And I mix colors and lose all sense of time and I go to this place where I feel the texture of the curtains and I sense the warmth of the woman's arm. I paint...  And the thin-lipped editor lady in me laughs again and points and sees nothing. But the optimist in me continues to see what I know awaits me. It's less like I'm painting and more like I'm revealing slowly what is already there. The "impossibility" of art takes place in the utter faith of the artist to work at it, pulling from the canvas what can be found beneath the brush. And maybe that sounds mysterious and odd, but that's a pretty good description of the process. I paint to see what I know is already there. It's much like writing fiction. The characters are alive already and waiting for the cue to live and interact with one another. All the writer does is record their actions and voices and that's all there is. As a writer, I've been surprised to hear what comes out of my characters' mouths. For example, in a story I wrote long ago, as one character stood up, I saw her pull the creep of the hem of her shorts downward. And so that's what I wrote. It wasn't contrived; that's just what she did. I had a woman later tell me in my college class that her action was so true. Heck, I was just watching it happen. There's no ownership in that. Truth is effortless. It's whether I'm skillful enough to record what happened that determines whether it's believable or not. Painting, like writing, is both a passive observation and an active exertion. I just have to be faithful to sit and do it. Isn't much of life like that? Whether starting a business, or working at business, or being a parent - isn't half the success just showing up to do the job? Kids are so thankful for parents who just show up. They remember it years later. "Dad wasn't always the best father, but he was at every one of my games." And you can hear the love in their voice for that. Just showing up. Amazing. Are paintings thankful for the artist who shows up to reveal them? Are characters in a story grateful to have their actions recorded? In a way, yes. All of us would like the opportunity to express ourselves, free of judgment, and to just let it flow. In that expression, we help ourselves. It's like when someone just has an outlet to vent a frustration or an ear to which they can talk. The friend just sits there listening. But we're incredibly thankful that they just showed up for us and gave us their time. Amazing. And so painting is like that. Some part of me is grateful that I just showed up and took the risk and took the leap of faith. I feel better for it. It makes me want to show up some more. ETC:  Enough for today... |
|
|
 | Bonnie and Howard |  |
Listening to Bonnie Raitt tonight, painting...  The Bonnie playlist: You
Not the Only One
Wounded Heart
Silver Lining
Nick of Time
Something to Talk About
Thing Called Love
I Don't Want Anything to Change
Love Letter
I Can't Make You Love Me
Have a Heart
One Part Be My Lover
Wherever You May Be
All At Once At the suggestion of a friend, I'm reading Ayn Rand's "The Fountainhead," which is odd for me because though I read voraciously, I never read fiction. I'm glued to this book. It's a book about the interweave of people with different passions and abilities, different directions and motivations. Here's a telling passage, about a house and its purpose and intent in designing and building it: "What is it that I like so much about the house you're building for me, Howard?""A house can have integrity, just like a person," said [Howard] Roark, "and just as seldom." "In what way?" "Well, look at it. Every piece of is there because the house needs it - and for no other reason. You see it from here as it is inside. The rooms in which you'll live made the shape. The relation of the masses was determined by the distribution of space within. The ornament was determined by the method of construction, an emphasis of the principle that makes it stand. You can see each stress, each support that meets it. Your own eyes go through a structural process when you look at the house, you can follow each step, you see it rise, you know what made it and why it stands. But you've seen buildings with columns that support nothing, with purposeless cornices, with pilasters, moldings, false arches, false windows. You've seen buildings that look as if they contained a single large hall, they have solid columns and single, solid windows six floors high. But you enter and find six stories inside. Or buildings that contain a single hall, but with a facade cut up into floor lines, band courses, tiers of windows. Do you understand the difference? Your house is made by its own needs. Those others are made by the need to impress. The determining motive of your house is in the house. The determining motive of the others is in the audience." "Do you know that that's what I've felt in a way? I've felt that when I move into this house, I'll have a new sort of existence, and even my simple daily routine will have a kind of honesty or dignity that I can't quite define. Don't be astonished if I tell you that I feel as if I'll have to live up to that house." "I intended that," said Roark. I think people and marriages are just like this and that we gravitate to those who give us the same exterior as what we find on the interior. It's a refreshing and indifferent honesty that cares nothing for the irrelevant opinion of others. When we do what we do for the true purpose of our soul, then we're where we need to be and doing what we need to do, whether it's popular or not.Earlier in the book, a fella named Peter Keating asks Howard Roark for his advice. "If you want my advice, Peter," he said at last, "you've made a mistake already. By asking me. By asking anyone. Never ask people. Not about your work. Don't you know what you want? How can you stand it, not to know?""You see, that's what I admire about you, Howard. You always know." "Drop the compliments." "But I mean it. How do you always manage to decide?" "How can you let others decide for you?" Does the opinion of others matter? No, not at all. What others think of me is not my responsibility, because it is not in my control. I can only be responsible for what I control, and the only thing on this earth that I control are my choices and my actions. If I align my actions with my purpose and talents, then I act in accordance with my destiny, if you will. My life is obvious and worthwhile. Anything else is fretful and a waste of time. I can only be who I am. I can't be what others demand of me that I am not.Good book. |
|
|
I've got four cards thus far.     I reworked both the kite picture and the child hug picture. Lightened up the shadowing somewhat in the kite picture and softened yet again the man in the hug picture. And reworked his hair. Much better. I spent a good part of my day with Mike Sansone, who is one of those people you count yourself blessed to know in life. Mike and I have been working on a business idea, but business idea aside, the better time was spent just talking to Mike. He made it to the blogger bash last night, and had a great time getting to know everyone. Wish I could have been there like last year, but too much going on. Part of last night was also spent buying a new scanner. That's what happens when I put mine on my bed and then absent-mindedly sit on it. The glass broke. I bought a new Epson. I like it better than the HP scanner that I had. One word about painting for your painters: buy a humdifier. Or two. It makes a great deal of difference, especially with acrylics. My humidifier sits in my bedroom right beside my drafting table where I paint. Perfect. Off to another painting. And by the way, Erin - my source is "Live Your Best Life," by Oprah. |
|
|
|
|
Hell of a Marketing Message |
 So, for the people in democracies who support Islamist threats toward governments, society, and people in protest of cartoons that depict Mohammed: is it really okay with you to limit artistic freedom and freedom of speech in the name of religion? For the people who think that the European papers shouldn't have printed the cartoons, do you really agree to limit artistic freedom and freedom of speech in the name of religion? Headlines like this (U.S. supports Muslim ire on cartoons) are completely counter-productive. Condi's State Department needs to talk to the White House before opening its mouth. And we need to stand in solidarity with our European neighbors. This is a democracy. We routinely skewer our politicians, our religious leaders, and God in the name of liberty. Nothing, truly, is sacred. Nor should it be. No one is protected from offense. Nor should they be. As I've said before, if Muslims don't want this image of their religion presented to the rest of us, then it's something that they need to clean up, just as Christians have to clean up after its infamous religious oaf, Pat Robertson. |
|
|
 I used a TON of dioxazine purple on this one. That was kind of fun. But that's the first card of the month. Lots more to follow... |
|
|
With Bach as accompaniment, I'm redoing the candles from last night's travesty. This is a better effort. I've got one candle pretty close to being done, and I'm ready to start the next one. But I wanted to take a break and thought I'd capture it in a picture before I walk about the house.  |
|
|
This being the month of February, I woke up excited today because it begins my month of painting cards! After a month of programming, I can turn loose on painting itself - woo hoo! Color me jazzed... I also got my card stock today, so I can even print the cards as I go in their actual finished size. Outstanding. I'm twice as jazzed. So I set out tonight on what I know will be a difficult painting: two candles burning next to one another. Acrylics don't lend themselves well to blending, and this one will be all about blending. No problem. Jump in and go. Except that I forgot that when I'm away from painting for so long, I come back to it painting like a 5th grader. And I mean no disrespect to 5th graders, who are no doubt better than I am after a month of left-brained thinking. So at 11 PM, after frutstrating myself for a couple of hours, I started over. And to my great relief, I remember again. It's all about seeing and not making assumptions.  Blend! I can rest more easily now. |
|
|
| | | | |
Protecting My Children's Future |
Several months back, I wrote a post saying that the first rule of life is "You are responsible for your things. If you need help, ask. If 'No' is the answer you hear, you are still responsible for your things." Society runs more smoothly when people act autonomously in their self-interest and take care of themselves, not expecting others to come to their rescue or pick up the slack in the wake of their procrastination or laziness or addiction. Which is most often the cause of dereliction of personal matters. In times when circumstances are truly beyond the control of a person, I have no problem with assistance - but it's amazing how often the root cause can be distilled to an issue of personal choice. I didn't watch Bush's speech last night, but I have read its text. This section is noteworthy. Keeping America competitive requires us to be good stewards of tax dollars. Every year of my presidency, we have reduced the growth of non-security discretionary spending – and last year you passed bills that cut this spending. This year my budget will cut it again, and reduce or eliminate more than 140 programs that are performing poorly or not fulfilling essential priorities. By passing these reforms, we will save the American taxpayer another 14 billion dollars next year – and stay on track to cut the deficit in half by 2009. I am pleased that Members of Congress are working on earmark reform – because the Federal budget has too many special interest projects. And we can tackle this problem together, if you pass the line-item veto. We must also confront the larger challenge of mandatory spending, or entitlements. This year, the first of about 78 million Baby Boomers turn 60, including two of my Dad’s favorite people – me, and President Bill Clinton. This milestone is more than a personal crisis – it is a national challenge. The retirement of the Baby Boom generation will put unprecedented strains on the Federal government. By 2030, spending for Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid alone will be almost 60 percent of the entire Federal budget. And that will present future Congresses with impossible choices – staggering tax increases, immense deficits, or deep cuts in every category of spending. Congress did not act last year on my proposal to save Social Security, yet the rising cost of entitlements is a problem that is not going away – and with every year we fail to act, the situation gets worse. So tonight, I ask you to join me in creating a commission to examine the full impact of Baby Boom retirements on Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid. This commission should include Members of Congress of both parties, and offer bipartisan answers. We need to put aside partisan politics, work together, and get this problem solved. Amen, brother. The impact of the entitlements on my children's generation is going to be staggering, and, I fear, overly burdensome. Congress has had a lot of fun giving away OPiuM (Other People's Money), and as addictive as that can be in helping them to be re-elected, it's wrong. Tragic though it might be that some seniors can't afford their prescription drugs, it was their responsibility to plan for that and is now the responsibility of their families to care for them. That they didn't plan for that is a matter of personal choice. And it's not the social responsibility of the next generation to take from the future income of my children to support the prescriptive needs of baby-boomer seniors.Bush didn't come out and say that his prescription drug plan was the wrong thing to do, but that's okay - I will. It was wrong. And I have no faith that a bi-partisan committee can achieve anything close to retracting the law. Where I do have hope is in those of us who have the power of our voices here on the Internet. The blogosphere, as it has come to be known, gets mighty vocal and more peruasive every day with politicians. Bloggers have an increasingly large voice, as has been shown again by the slippery House Majority Leader campaign. No longer is Tom Delay's choice of Roy Blunt of Missouri a shoe-in, but instead solidly conservative Arizona upstart John Shadegg looks more likely to be the next leader. Shadegg has the avid blessing of the bloggers, who are also fervent about the Porkbusters campaign. The only good earmark is one that has died like a salted slug. No more pork. The government is not its own money source; the people are its source. It is irresponsible to re-allocate future monies from children toward others when those children have no voice about their future. No taxation without respresentation - remember that? Since they are not of voting age, they can't speak to the problem at the ballot box. They'll only inherit a mess, and have to undo the problem later, which will be far more painful once lavish spending programs are in place. That's wrong. Such a practice is utterly immoral. It's a good first step that Bush addressed the issue, but in the couple of years of his presidency that remain, he needs to undo what he has wrongly done and terminate the programs installed during his terms in office. I don't think he has the nerve to do it. But that's okay - we the people will keep up the heat on this one. |
| | | | | |
|
|
I mentioned to a friend at work today that I sometimes feel like I'm trying to peer into my future and gain some solid ground and certainty. Everyone does, I know, but I feel like I'm cheating and skipping to the end of the book to read the ending and know that it turns out okay. In Improv Wisdom, Patricia Ryan Madson refers to this as "embracing the wobble." Like riding a bike, the act of balancing - or maybe it's better said as being able to balance - is more important than being balanced. Biking brings turns and bumps and such. A good lean into a curve takes skilled adjustment and an act of balance, whereas being balanced on a bike would be to sit still on it and go nowhere. Which is more fun? This same friend gave me a book last fall called "Now, Discover Your Strengths." Mine were as follows, and I'll include a really brief description of each from the book: - Learner ("You love to learn.")
- Strategic ("Enables you to sort through the clutter and find the best route.")
- Input ("You are inquisitive. You collect things.")
- Communication ("You like to explain, to describe, to host, to speak in public, and to write.")
- Activator ("You are impatient for action.")
I've set two in bold: strategic and activator. I do this because it ties in with skipping ahead in the book of my life. It's burned into my nature to find the shortest route and get there right now. If you read my web site, you might get that impression about me. If you know me in person, you know that I'm a very patient guy with people - especially with kids. But where I'm concerned, "Let's go! I know the way!" is my mantra.Except that life doesn't always allow me to run in the direction I think best. Sometimes, circumstances intervene. And then I get antsy and a bit panicked. I need to learn that it's okay to just be still and enjoy the moment. Painting helps to take me to the moment. Painting (yayy!!) starts tomorrow. I finish this phase of the ArtByBrett web site tonight. I already know of some features I'll need to introduce in March when I get done with my month of painting, but I'm tired of coding and I'm eager for the brush. (And speaking of painting, I went to Kris' house tonight and bought one of her works. Wonderful, wonderful!) On this, Day #15,063 of my life, I've re-learned that not knowing how it will turn out is okay. I should just hang in the mystery and enjoy the book. One page a day... and no skipping ahead. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
